I have a story of complete malevolence to tell, that will shock you to the very core of your being.
Last Thursday evening, we zoomed down the M6, and at Penrith turned right, heading into mountains of the Lake District. We anticipated nothing but a peaceful time together. Little did we know what lay just around the corner........
A dense fog had descended, so we made our way very tentatively, guided by the firm voice of TomTom. Despite the fog, she spoke with authority and we trusted that she knew the way when we could not see what was ahead of us. Which would have been fine, except that she took us up the wrong road. Well, I say the wrong road....ultimately it would have joined the correct road, but only after petering out into a rutted cart-track that would have torn our suspension apart.
Fortunately, we realised this before it was too late. Some locals saw our predicament and came out to help us. Apparently we weren't the first to have made this mistake. In the dark and fog, I began to wonder if this was some plot to lure unsuspecting motorists to their doom, in much the same way as wreckers lured ships on to rocks in order to 'rescue' the salvaged goods.
All turned out well, as we managed to reverse along the narrow slate-walled track. However, I did manage to cover Ms Gadget Vicar in mud as we wheelspinned.
Lesson learned: sat nav is not to be trusted, can be evil and will most probably manifest these attributes when a spooky fog is about.
Said sat nav has now been exorcised. Our marriage remains intact, in spite of the mud-slinging.